To Get Kisame
by RANDOMNATIONS
Summary: Itachi learns Sexy no Jutsu from Naruto and tries to learn it to "impress" Kisame, but Kisame finds him before he can finish the 'learning' stage of that plan. KisaIta, Yaoi. Don't like, don't read.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. **

**Warnings: Yaoi. KisaIta. No sexual themes yet. if i get the urge to write it, this is where it'll go..**

Kisame opened the door to a puff of smoke. "Itachi?"

"Get out, Kisame." It sounded like a higher pitch of Itachi's voice, but Kisame couldn't tell what was going on through the smoke. Was Itachi in trouble? Burstng through the smoke, Kisame fell on top of a small human figure. The smoke cleared gradually, giving Kisame small glimpses of who he was pinning to the ground.

First he saw black hair, just like Itachi's. Was it Sasuke? No… his hair was more like a bird's ass. This was definitely Itachi's hair, only there was a lot more of it. It was shiny, and soft, and the only thing covering...

A beautiful naked female? Kisame wiped blood away from his nose and hauled whats-her-face to her feet. Staring at her face, Kisame saw wrinkles on either side of her nose, just like Itachi's.

Thinking of Itachi, where was he? Or was this… girl… really Itachi? "Itachi?" He said softly.

Her eyes flickered open, revealing the whirling crimson of Sharingan. "Itachi?" louder this time. Kisame's voice broke. What had they done to him—if this was, indeed, the true Itachi.

"Kisa--" Her eyes drifted closed, and Kisame felt her chakra signature wink out. It would take someone with extreme knowledge of the Uchiha to know his chakra signature; this was definitely Itachi.

"Itachi," Kisame murmured quietly, "I'm going to ignore this all, and put you to bed. Okay?"

"Mmmm….." 'Itachi' rolled over, exposing her whole body with the most peacefully innocent expression on…'her'… sleeping face. Or, more like completely out cold.

Kisame carrier Itachi to the bed that they had been forced to share. The last 50 or so inns that they had stayed at had only one-bed rooms left by the time Itachi and Kisame got there. The first 30 or so Kisame could let go as "coincidence", but after that it became obvious that Itachi liked sleeping with Kisame instead of alone.

Placing Itachi on the bed, Kisame sat down on the couch and watched as the…woman… shifted her small frame on the bed to find a more comfortable position. Somehow, Itachi had drained all of his chakra. Kisame wondered how he had done it in such a short time.

Gradually, lulled by Itachi's shallow breaths, Kisame drifted off to sleep. When he woke up, Itachi, fully dressed and male, was sitting on the bed staring at Kisame. "Whu--" Kisame muttered, sitting up to stare at Itachi.

"You saw me." It was a simple statement. Kisame's memory from the night before came rushing back and he didn't like it.

"I'm gonna go back to sleep, Itachi," was all he said.

"No, you're not. It'll keep you awake. You know it will. You saw me." There it was again, that simple 'you saw me'.

"Yes, I saw you." Looking at the clock, Kisame sighed. "It's two in the morning. Can we please talk about this later?" His eyelids drooped, and he shifted on the couch, trying to find a more comfortable position.

"No. Now." Kisame knew the Uchiha could be demanding, but this was a little much.

And besides, Kisame really didn't want to know why Itachi had been a girl last night. Kisame loved Itachi as he was; if Itachi didn't know that, it was his own fault. Sighing again, he gave in. "Fine. Let's talk." Kisame sat up, leaned against the couch, rubbed his eyes and yawned.

"How much did you see."

It wasn't a question, nor a demand. It was a question, phrased as a statement. Kisame knew this and, because of it, paid a little more attention to Itachi. Normally, he didn't order Kisame around with such force. Itachi had to be getting desperate to cover up something. However, Kisame still didn't know what Itachi was trying to cover up. Yeah, he had been a girl. Yeah, he had been naked, and beautiful. Kisame still didn't get the whole scope of it. It could have been a jutsu gone wrong.

However, it wasn't a jutsu gone wrong. Itachi remembered when he had first learned Sexy no Jutsu. He had been with Naruto, before he escaped. Itachi and Kisame had captured Naruto, and were in the process of bringing him back when he escaped. In that time, however, the blond had learned a lot about Itachi and Kisame.

For instance, how Itachi felt about Kisame. Naruto learned a lot about how Itachi felt... or didn't feel. Itachi didn't feel many emotions, but those he felt towards his partner were those of love. Completely inexplicable, but still love. Lust, even, at times. Naruto and Itachi both knew this, and they both knew better than to tell Kisame.

When Itachi had caught Naruto using his Sexy no Jutsu to get a sticky bun from Kisame, Itachi suddenly had an idea. The hardest part would be to get Kisame so half-awake that he would agree.

"What exactly are we talking about, Itachi?" Itachi was brought back to the present by Kisame's voice.

"We're talking about what you saw earlier." Itachi's voice was as smooth as glass, and he was happy that it didn't shatter with all of the emotion he had hidden behind his indifferent façade.

"What exactly DID I see earlier, Itachi?"

Itachi was at a loss. With no words to explain himself, he simply got up and sat in the older man's lap. Looking up into Kisame's blue eyes, Itachi murmured something intelligible.

"What was that, Itachi?"

"I…" Itachi couldn't do it. Burying his face in Kisame's chest, he was overcome with emotion that he had kept inside for too long. Dry sobs tore themselves from his throat as he choked, clinging with pale, delicate fingers that embodied so much strength.

Kisame held him, knowing he needed it. Who knows how long it had been since someone had held the Uchiha? He was so cold all the time Kisame couldn't tell. Truth be told, Kisame was made nervous by Itachi's crying. He had never seen as much as a whisper of emotion on Itachi's face, ever.

"Shh… shh…" Kisame rubbed Itachi's back as he cried and then, all of a sudden, sat up. No tears were on his face now.

"Kisame, I…"

"I know." Hugging Itachi, Kisame whispered, "I love you too."

**A/N: This might be going somewhere. If I get enough reviews, I might even add more. Maybe even a lemon. Not that I'm any good at those... If anyone wants to step in and help out, I would be more than grateful. **


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